March 1st, 2016 was the day my whole world changed. My best friend Sabrina lost her battle to postpartum depression. I had no idea that she was struggling. As I walked up to her urn on a rainy day in April I couldn’t help but say, “We are too young to say goodbye like this.” I didn’t know what to feel. There were so many emotions that I didn’t know what to do with. Feelings of guilt, anger, sadness, helpless, broken, numb.
Weeks after her funeral, I was in the hospital giving birth to my second child. We named her Teresa after Mother Teresa and she truly lives up to that name! During the birth, It was hard for me to feel anything. I was still broken, I was still numb, I was still grieving. Of course, I loved my sweet girl but I couldn’t help but feel grief. I thought,”She’s supposed to be here. She should be coming over to congratulate me!”
The moment we took our baby home, I felt the darkness of postpartum depression come upon me. I wasn’t sure what it felt like at first. I thought this was just grief and that eventually, it would subside. It did not, It continued and got darker for the next 8 months of my child’s life. After many suicide attempts and being sent to the hospital, my husband and I decided that I should quit working and work on my self, my healing. It was the biggest risk we have taken but it was a matter of life and death. I had no other choice.
Throughout this whole transition of not working and healing, I felt that I was called to save the other mothers. I didn’t want anyone to ever felt what Sabrina and I felt. That was the darkest time in my life that no one should have to go through this alone. Thus, The Always with Me Foundation was created!
We are of many things. We are a support group, online and in person. We are a podcast full of stories of moms that have survived the darkness and even professionals that share their tips. We are advocates for maternal mental health. No ONE will ever struggle silently! But most of all, we are postpartum doulas for all moms of any financial class. We believe that every mother deserves the help as she transitions into motherhood. A happy mother results in a happy family.
Of course, in order to do all of these things, we NEED YOUR help! Donations are always welcome. With your help, maternal mental illness will no one have its stigma! We can do this together! <3
Find us on Facebook to keep up to date with upcoming events. To find out more about having a postpartum doula at your home, please send an email at Info@alwayswithme.org
Coming soon: A list of the services provided.
Thank you for spending the time to hear my story.
-Diana Collins, Founder & President